‘Welcome to Newgeeland’

  • FG Bureau
  • India
  • Jun 19, 2015

In the year 2025, if Gurgaon is still alive, we may find:

It is now called New G Land – ‘The Land’ for short; and ‘New Global Land’ for long. It has transformed many times - starting as the Delhi suburb, then The Pride of Haryana, Delhi II, followed by Bombay II…before uniquely becoming India’s first global city, New G Land. However, it is still part of Haryana – and now the winter Capital (only of Haryana)...though that process is still in progress. It has been difficult to define this New Land – parts New York, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Dharavi…. It is a land of 5 million - and ‘overall’ there are 10 million, within Greater G Land (GG Land). Within these, there are a million dollar millionaires (yes, the dollar survived). There is also the old G’City (called new once), and the yet older G’gaon. All of India is here – this is our El Dorado. There are a thousand high-rises, from the Delhi border to Manesar.  Offices and establishments in the 500 acres ‘G Scape’, the Central Entertainment cum Business District (CEBD), are valued at Rs. 100,000 a square foot; land is just not available. The entry sign reads: ‘Welcome to G Scape, no strings attached’. G Scape is home to all the Global Fortune 100 and India 500 (10 common between them) companies. The entertainment hub is the ‘G Spot’ – where dreams are fulfilled. This mini-Kingdom has a 10-Star Hotel, offering 100 suites – priced at 10,000 dollars a night. On weekends only cycles are allowed in G Scape.

Greater G Land now boasts of India’s first, and the world’s largest, Disneyland. It has global themes, and a special Indian section. GG Land also boasts a Film Centre called Gollywood (chosen over Gullywood, the residents’ first choice). It has screened its first venture – Ali in Wonder Land (a global English-Hindi-Haryanvi-Arabic venture). The world’s largest mall, the G Chowk, has opened in GG Land, and has eclipsed the Mall of India. There is NCR Metro connectivity from Sonipat to Sohna, and Meerut to Manesar – of course both via New G Land. A new international cargo airport has come up in GG Land, off NH8. It was approved after quite a political ruckus. A CEO, under PPP (Public Private Partnership) runs the New G Land Municipality, with the help of RWAs. The Mayor title has been upgraded to Senior Mayor. HUDA has moved on to Faridabad (one last time), and Jhajjar. There are hourly snatchings – of mobile wallets, and one-hour kidnappings for the same. This is despite the new areas of New G Land having state-of-the-art security and every millionaire having a security guard (as well as one for each family member). However, ‘serious’ crime is low, as The Land has been given VIZ (Very Important Zone) status – the first in the country. That is also why the Maha Sena has not been able to establish itself in The Land. Traffic is managed by volunteers. Cows still roam on the roads…and monkeys in houses. Power is totally privatised – to the oil companies (which also have been privatised). The Land runs on diesel – 24x7, delivered by mega tankers. Water is also delivered by mega tankers (fortunately different ones) daily. Water levels are now such that comparisons with Las Vegas abound for this also. Sewage is collected by the third type of mega tankers. The haze overhead is now being compared to Beijing circa 2010. The moon is seen once in a blue while. All unauthorised colonies have again been regularised, and encroachments demolished. Meanwhile 16 more have erupted, and/or come to light. The Land is now all flat and brown. People reminisce of a time when the Aravalli Hills were outside one’s window; now it’s the neighbour – of the building across.

 A thousand  nursery schools bloom. A single university offers just Commerce – up to doctorate level. New G Land is the mecca for Medical Tourism – the top facilities accept only dollars, even from Indians. A separate ambulance path, called Medical Vedanta, has been created from T3A Terminal to The Land. IT and BPO companies have moved south – to Rewari, and Rajasthan. The Ammunition Depot had to be moved; a new adventure entertainment mini-city called ‘G Force’ has come up there, complete with its own 18-hole ‘G Course’. New G Land has been priced out for the common man. He now stays in the old G’City area (thankfully not the G’gaon area – that is ancient !). However, the ‘rich poor’ still remain in the Land – as workers.  Bangladesh has moved its Embassy from New Delhi to The Land. Parking facilities have been started at all office complexes on weekends. However, many residents believe that the parking fee of Rs. 30 (equal to a dollar) is too much, and still prefer the roads. This is despite the Prime Minister having introduced 2 compulsory subjects - Civic Sense and Road Sense – in all schools, from 2020. Haryana added ‘G Sense’. No one talks in New G Land – blah blah is now blog blog. Kids start on this very early – at age 2. Unfortunately parents still wish to talk. Thankfully the walls are still listening. Offices now have blog conferences. Expatriates number a million. They come on special salaries, designed by the U.N. for this unique Land – which is now costlier than New York, and  even Shanghai. A normal 1,000 sq. ft. ‘skypad’ (any accommodation above ground floor) in a New G Land condominium costs over a million dollars. When global businessmen and tourists enter New G Land they exclaim  ‘Awe G!’ - followed by a sigh. They remain wide-eyed and tongue-tied…though noses-held (they cannot ignore the stench). It has been difficult to clean the old G’City area. New G Land is also the favourite destination for all NRIs; they love visiting ‘Newgeeland in India’. You’ve come a long way, Gurugram!

It’s all been a very efficient operation – except for the week in 2020. No one wants to look back on that, even on hindsight - though most had left The Land by the third day. And of course none wish to remember the earthquake of 2016 – before the City became The Land. It was a very dramatic way to discover the quality of construction. Some of those buildings still ‘stand’ in the City – cracked and abandoned. 


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